Deepak Chopra thinks physicists stole quantum from him.

Deepak Chopra is a name that gets exasperated sighs from the scientifically literate whenever it is heard.  He is one of the most profitable names in the world of newage (rhymes with sewage) and his ability to misuse words is legendary.  His personal favorite is the word 'quantum', much to the chagrin of actual physicists.  To quote Inigo Montoya, "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

He relies on the fact that most people are utterly baffled by the world of quantum mechanics to sell his particular brand of snake oil.  He understands that your average person knows that quantum is a word used by scientists and nothing more.  As such he knows that if he throws it and other equally exotic sounding words around, he can convince the credulous of anything.

Recently, in a short interview by Richard Dawkins for his recent documentary "Enemies of Reason", Deepak Chopra took his hijacking of the scientific terminology to an even greater depth of depravity.  During a segment (which can be viewed here), Chopra claimed that:

"the aficionados in the world of quantum physics have somehow hijacked the word for their own use"

This is a rather amazing feat by physicists considering that the word first entered the scientific literature in 1841, 105 years before Chopra's birth.  Apparently quantum theorists have mastered time travel in their spare time.

The word quantum was first used by Julius von Mayer in a letter on the formulation of the first law of thermodynamics.  The word comes from the Latin "quantus" for "how much".  It is generally used as a short hand way of writing a 'quantum of energy', meaning a single unit of energy.  A good example being how a photon is a single quantum of the electromagnetic force.

The term quantum has since gone on to refer to the area of physics that involves the very small.  It is renowned as being an area of science that is both counter intuitive and hard to grasp.  This was summed up perfectly by Richard Feynman when he stated "If you think you understand quantum mechanics, you don't understand quantum mechanics".

This quote, along with the myriad bizarre concepts of the quantum realm have fed an ever growing number of charlatans who profit off the ignorance of the general public when it comes to the various fields of advance science.  They know that such words as quantum lend an air of respectability to their otherwise meaningless ramblings.  In doing so, they further mislead the public away from the discoveries of science, not to mention out of their hard earned cash.

Despite sounding authentic and wise to laymen, Deepak Chopra and his ilk earn nothing but ire and perpetual face palms from the scientific community.  His stance on 'quantum' can be summed up by this clip from the ever poignant "Futurama", enjoy.

Raëlism

Ah, the Raëlians. A group who no one can quite agree as to whether they are a religion or not. Sure, they have all the crazy beliefs of a religion, but at the same time, they claim not to believe in any gods or the existence of the human soul. While it is technically possible to have a religion without a belief in either of these, they tend to help. Most governments view the Raëlians as a cult and to be honest, I don't blame them.

Describing Raëlism is not an simple task. Especially if you like short, easy to digest comparisons. But I'll try, just because the idea of my readers looking confused entertains me. Imagine what would happen if a Mormon and a Scientologist had children, raised them to be hippies and then the confused offspring founded a UFO cult. If only I could see all of your dumbfounded looks right now. Perhaps I should attempt to explain things in a bit more depth, unless that actually made sense to any of you (in which case I fear for your sanity).

Like all good crazy cults, it has a crazy leader. In this case, Raël, or Claude Vorilhon as he used to be called. But apparently Claude doesn't sound mystical enough so he adopted the name Raël. Names like that get you instant street cred with the New Agers. According to Raël, he was informed that he was to be the final prophet of humanity by Yahweh. He was told this aboard a spaceship that he encountered in Clermont-Ferrand, France near a volcano in 1973. Wait...since when did the Judeo-Christian god get his own spaceship?

Well apparently it wasn't that Yahweh, but he was an Elohim in the Mormons sense...kinda. While the Elohim of the Raëlians are also space dwelling super-beings, they are not the god...things of Mormonism. Instead they are proper aliens who apparently look like vertically challenged humans with green skin and big eyes. Almost like the "Grays" of modern alien mythology, only apparently constantly nauseous in a cartoon like way.

Anyway, Yahweh informed Claude that he was to be the last in a long line of human prophets chosen by the Elohim. He was to join the ranks of such heavy hitters as Moses, Jesus, Buddha, Confucius, Muhammad, Joseph Smith and a few others. All of the messages of these previous prophets has apparently been distorted into the modern false beliefs that they are now. He was told that there is no god and no such thing as an eternal soul. Things like this make Raëlism rather odd as there are going to be parts here and there that an intelligent person will agree with...unfortunately it is just a piece of logic floating in a confusing soup of idiocy (so in that sense I guess it is more like a religion).

So why did these aliens have an interest in the mostly hairless apes of this planet? Well it seems they created us, and all other life on Earth. Yes, Raëlism is technically an atheistic version of Intelligent Design. They even use the term for the most recent title of one of their books Intelligent Design: Message from the Designers, formerly titled The Message Given to me by Extraterrestrials (once again showing that the name Intelligent Design can make anything sound less crazy at first).

The Elohim, finding Earth a barren, lifeless world used their technology to terraform the planet (they terraformed Terra?) engineer all of the life on this planet in hopes that their most important creation, humanity, would one day join them. But instead of being attentive parents they, I don't know, got distracted or something. So other than the occasional prophet, they left us alone. But Raël claims that if we can only stop killing each other and establish an Embassy for Extraterrestrials (that is the real name, by the way) in Jerusalem then they will totally let us in on their awesome party they have scheduled for 2025.

With this information in hand Claude was transformed from a failed sports writer and race car driver into Raël, "The Prophet for the Third Millenium" and he began his quest to get people to give him 10% of their income and gather his own personal harem...I mean, spread the good word.

Like any cultist who has dreams of sleeping with woman out of his league, Raël supports the idea of free love. While I can support their idea of seeing sexuality between consenting adults as just another part of what makes us human as well as their view that sex work is just, well, work, the fact that these people are utterly nuts kind of makes it hard to get behind them. I'm further confused by the groups logical reasoning when it comes to things like genetically modified organisms and their outcry against the crimes committed by the Vatican and its cover-up of molestations by Catholic clergy.

But just when I start to think that they might be making a bit of sense for once they start trying to talk about scientific concepts. Like every other newage group out there, they enjoy taking scientific ideas and getting them horribly wrong. The best example of this is their views on cloning and genetics. The Raëlians gained some acclaim a few years back when their company Cloneaid (I imagine this should be the name of a futuristic juice drink) claimed to have cloned a human being. Granted their claim was utter bullshit, but it garnered them plenty of attention and probably quite a few converts. They believe that cloning is the key to human immortality as well as a way to resurrect the dead. You see, they believe that things like memory are encoded in our DNA. So all you have to do is get a cell culture of a dead person and they can be cloned and the resulting individual would actually be the person who died, not just a genetic copy. They hope to one day perfect the process and grant immortality to the human race.

They also believe that the Elohim have distant computers that record the memories and DNA of every person who ever lived and that one day a Judgment will occur where the dead are resurrected though such cloning to atone for or be rewarded for the lives they lived. Though if they believe that DNA records our memories I wonder why they have to record our memories separately. This inconsistency is also shown in their punishment of those they deem deviants. Such people can be excommunicated for seven years, after which they can be taken back into the fold. The reason for the time of seven years has to do with their belief that the human body regenerates itself every seven years and by then they will have purged themselves of the 'sin'. This seems to be a bastardization of the fact that it takes about seven years for the human body to replace all our parts with new cells or cellular components.

All in all the Raëlians are little more than a bunch who use technobabble as an explanation for religion as well as one bored man's attempt to get rich and live a life filled with orgies.

Tim Minchin - Storm

Tim Minchin, who is absolutely hilarious and brilliant in his music, recently made a short animation. Now this alone would warrant a post, but the content of the short makes it even more important for me, personally, to write something about it. The reason being is I have done this very thing on more then one occasion. I shall let you watch it before continuing on.



Now that you have had a chance to watch it, my following rant will make a bit more sense.

I cannot stand misinformation (or even more egregious, disinformation). I would rather listen to someone carve out a lecture with a knife onto a chalk board than have to sit through such stupidly wrong garbage as was quoted by the character Storm in this short. It sets me off like few other things can. Now if it is an honest mistake, I can stay calm easily enough and just provide the accurate information and why it is right by current standards. But if it is the kind of newage crap as this was, my brain just wants to projectile vomit.

It is even worse when I'm in the company of others who also have to listen to this idiocy. Because part of my mind is always afraid they will think "they have a point...". The worry that this kind of moronic meme will continue to infect other and subdue minds is more than I can bear. I have to do something to stop it.

So I all to often go into a rant about how utterly wrong whatever it was they just uttered was and why it is so off base. If the facts could simply speak for themselves to your average person, all I would have to do is explain them simply and all would be right with the world. But unfortunately for me and every other rational mind on this planet, people are often painfully stupid. So much so that they listen more to how something is said than what is actually said. Granted I will still present the data as I believe this is key. But a good mocking doesn't hurt either. Not to mention it gets rid of some of that pent up rage brought on by such inane babble.

As I stated earlier, if it is an innocent mistake or misinformation that a person heard and is just parroting, I am generally more kind. This is a mistake that all humans, including myself are guaranteed to do at some point in their existence. And if I know the person and can see that they have just been led astray by others with wrong information. I too tend to be calm and reasonable in my replies. But if it is someone whose words are so coated in smug that I need a shower after hearing them, it gets a bit hard not to see what their bowels look like after I verbally eviscerate them.

Now perhaps this isn't always the best route to go. But I have found more often than not that if you can destroy such an opponent with skill in front of others, whatever they said has far less impact upon those listening. In fact the only ones who tend not to change their view are those, like Storm, who are so ensconced within their stupidity that they are beyond reach by any sane mind.

One of the reasons I react so powerfully to such stupid is that it makes no bloody sense to me. As Tim Minchin stated, "Isn't this enough, just this beautiful, complex, wonderfully unfathomable natural world?" There is nothing I find more amazing than this universe and the fact that we can understand even an iota of it. The fact that we are constantly moving forward, uncovering more wonders than we could have ever hoped to conceive of on our own, is utterly astounding to me. This universe, and all the knowledge within, is the closest to the platonic archetype of beauty that I am aware of. Yet people such as Storm and the others like her are completely unable to see it, either through ignorance or fear. But they are not content with just missing the stunning beauty, no, they have to taint the image for others as well. They have to drag others down into their dank pit of ignorance and relish in their own stupidity. They shun true beauty for the imaginary and want as many others as they can infect to do the same. They are the very reason our species is not further along than we are. They are the ones who feed off fear, they are the ones who feed off ignorance, they are the very cancer of the mind that has kept us trapped where we are for far too long. They are the enemy of reason, of thought, of wonder and of freedom. And they are as annoying as all hell.

Quantum Pendants

Ah, another case of newage. This time it is the Dalimara Quantum Pendants. This 'amazing' bit of jewelery is well...I'm not exactly sure...I'll just let them describe their product to begin with.

Quantum Science Scalar Energy Pendant is a wearable handmade jewelry made from special Japanese volcanic lava containing over 70 Natural Cosmic Energy Minerals, manufactured in our ISO Certified factory in Asia processed under extreme temperature before it is coagulated to form bio-ceramics under low temperature treatment & structurally bonded together at a molecular level. Our Quantum Pendant has the highest negative ions count in the market making it the most effective & fast action results. We combine the mixture of deep-sea volcanic rocks and surface volcanic lava rocks only found in Japan. These two elements when combined emits more scalar energy than any Quantum Pendant in the market guaranteed. This Quantum Pendant emits scalar energy including the essential K40 resonance that promotes positive flow of energy & helps to maintain energy balance. You can get the same energy level 2500 negative ions by going to water falls or caves. 2500 negative ions can only emit scalar energy that can penetrate up to 2" deep in our body. where as 3000-4500 negative ions can go as far as 4" & energizes water & food faster. Scalar energy is a natural good energy & doesn't have any side effect. It potentially harmonize your body's life-force by absorbing heat energy and transforming it into bio-energy which helps your body's metabolic functions achieve holistic wellness. Wear it on a chain or carry it in your pocket. The scalar energy from the Quantum Pendant works outwardly and within the body. Outwardly scalar energy enhances the body’s bio-field. Inwardly it works to facilitate cell permeability and thereby enhances the many physiological functions of the cells in the body. You can also use the Quantum Pendant to energize drinking water, food (raw or cooked), personal beauty applications (lotions, moisturizers, hair grower etc..), it prolong shelf life of flower, fresh fruits and vegetables, energizes your pets or aquarium fish(es) and many more....

Quantum Pendant conserves its natural cosmic energy through its highly permeable and synergetic properties. Quantum Pendant or sometimes called as Scalar Pendant, Energy Pendant, Chi Pendant or Bio Pendant has high resonant properties which release natural cosmic energy "SCALAR ENERGY" bearing wavelengths measuring 4u – 12u, correlating with the human body’s wavelength of 9.8u – 10u(BioElectric Field) at a temperature of 36 -37 degree Celsius, with permeation strength of 13cm to 15cm.

Astonishing, it does...I have no idea. I have a firm grasp of quantum mechanics and this makes parts of my brain reel at the technobabble. Cosmic energy, scalar energy, bio-ceramics...I really don't know where to begin. It is as if they took as many woo terms as they could and crammed them together.

I should probably address scalar energy as that one at least sounds like it could be a real term. But it is not, it is a term that essentially means 'free-energy'. Sometimes added with Zero Point Energy, which has been adopted by the woo from a once considered idea in physics that is now understood to be caused by the activity of the quantum foam, virtual particles and such. However the term, just like many concepts that are poorly understood by laymen, has been turned into the idea of free energy from the universe.

It gets worse, believe it or not, they go on to describe its 'benefits':

Quantum Pendant with Scalar Energy Benefits to our Body

Strengthens the body's biofied preventing electro-magnetic waves (EMF) arising from mobile phones from effecting one's health
Reduces inflammation
Enhances energy level for endurance and speed
Improves the exercise recovery rate
Reduces jet lag on long flights and shorten recovery time after landing
Reduces motion sickness
Promotes unclumping of cells
Enhances fluid and energy circulation
Enhances immune and endocrine systems
Has the ability to destroy viruses and bacteria
Facilitates delivery of nutrients to cells and detoxification of toxins
Enhances cellular permeability
Assist and strengthen your resilience and resistance to the effects of stress

It is snake oil in jewelry form. If you have actually taken the time to read through the site, as I unfortunately did, you will probably have as big a headache and a confused look upon your face as I now do.

The makers of this...thing, have a special going on, buy 4 and get 1 free! Because why should you settle for only one item that does absolutely nothing when you can have five of them.

A psychic proves his talent.

I came across this via Pharyngula and couldn't help but steal...eh...I mean share it.

Such amazing psychic powers, no?

10 (mocked) Ways to Boost Your Psychic Abilities

I must confess, I do love taunting the idiocy of others. Some may see this as a bit paradoxical as those who know me generally see me as someone who is incredibly caring and someone who will do all he can to help others. This is so noticeable that when I stopped by the American Red Cross today, everyone recognized me instantly despite not seeing most of them for a year (a year ago I volunteered at a shelter during an ice storm, which is where I met these people, as well as being called their "Angel in Black"). Despite how much I want to better humanity, I cannot resist a chance for a good taunting. Even with my empathy being as strong as it is so that I begin feeling the emotions of those around me, I still have to admit that I have a taste for the schadenfreude. So to satiate that, here is a little list I found on "10 ways to boost your psychic abilities"

1. Whenever the telephone rings, close your eyes and visualize the person who is calling. Then pick up the phone and discover if you’re right. Your accuracy will improve dramatically as you practice this exercise, and this exercise may help you develop your clairvoyant abilities in addition to intuition and precognition.

Oh yes, lets all use confirmation bias as a way to tell if you are getting better or not. Once you master this difficult ability to notice trends you will be left with two possibilities. 1) Either you are guessing based upon who would be calling you at this point in time or you are thinking of recent events and who it would spur to call you. 2) You notice who calls you the most so you just keep guessing that name and notice that you are right more often then you are wrong. Or maybe I'm giving you too much credit, maybe you are just too dumb to notice anything and keep guessing randomly and get happy the few times you get it right and think "this is working!". In that case, congratulations, you have completed a round in the Skinner Box.

2. When you stand in line at the bank, tell yourself which teller will serve you. This exercise is similar to the first, but you can see your “target." This exercise helps you develop your intuition and your ability to psychically connect with others who are in close proximity.

Or you will make the teller nervous, "Why is she staring at me so intently...am I about to get robbed?" This one isn't even fare. Who doesn't look at the people in front of them and think how long their particular transaction will take? It really isn't hard to predict who will be the one to serve you as you get closer to the point as it is all based on actions before you. How is that psychic?

3. When you watch a sporting event, tell yourself the outcome before the event begins. As you develop skill with this exercise, expand to predicting more statistics such as scores or top 5 placements in racing or judged events. This exercise helps you develop your intuition, precognition, and clairvoyance. Do not misuse this skill for personal gain, such as gambling, or you will likely lose your skill entirely.

Wait, so you are trying to get them to develop this supposedly innate ability, but once they do they are not allowed to use it for personal gain? What other reason could you possibly have? Oh wait...I see, if you try it for personal gain you will actually test it, thus setting up an experiment, and when the result is that you are just guessing you find you have lost your 'ability'. It basically states that you should not question us...

4. Have a friend roll a dice. Begin by calling “even" or “odd" before the dice is thrown your accuracy will increase with practice. Expand to call the number the dice will land on. This exercise helps you develop your intuition, precognition and clairvoyance (specifically your ability to see numbers).

Ok...we start with a fifty-fifty chance. I'm sure that will make someone feel good about themselves. But you push further, testing the limits of the human psyche! You ask them to dare partake in guessing something with only one-in-six chance, how devious. Why is it that each time I roll the dice they always stop on ones, like two little eyes looking at me...they know...they know all!

5. Work with a friend and a standard deck of playing cards. Begin by predicting black or red, and then have your friend turn over the top card of the deck. Your accuracy will improve with practice. When your accuracy is 80% or greater, expand to predict the suit, and later, the number or face of the card as well. This exercise boosts your intuition, precognition, and clairvoyance (specifically colours and shapes).

Yes, bring in a friend, they won't at all think that you are a bit 'special'. And they certainly are not going along with this because it is far easier then seeing you break down crying. Yes, just go with what the crazy person says, it is safer this way.

6. When you’re riding an elevator and another passenger joins you, tell yourself which button they’ll press. This exercises helps you develop your intuition, precognition, clairvoyance (number recognition), telepathy, and your ability to connect with others psychically.

So from a limited amount of numbers, we are again supposed to pick which floor they are going to...well unless you live in a city with lots of high rises you are going to be limited to three or four numbers. But I'm feeling generous, try and predict what number out of so many, I'm sure your power will be inversely proportional to the number of buttons...

7. In the morning, write down the names of people you will have important interactions or communications with that day. Don’t rely on logic. Clear your mind and allow faces or names to come to you naturally. Trust it and write it down. Using this exercise regularly will significantly improve your accuracy.

And thus guiding you towards those very people you were thinking about. What, I can think of a person and then meet them during the day...I must be psychic! Now according to this logic anything my subconscious throws at me could be my encounter....damn I just thought of a tiger...I'm screwed

8. When in line at the movies, tell yourself which movie the person or group ahead of you will request (if you overhear them say it, try again another time!). This exercise helps you improve your intuition concerning the intentions, preferences and actions of others, and it can lead to developing telepathy and empathy.

Oh! there is a limited amount of options, which movie will they pick, the one that has been here for about a week or the new flashy one. So hard to tell...But what if I'm wrong, you never tell me what to do when I'm wrong. Am I channeling my psychic energies in the wrong direction?

9. When you have a meeting or appointment, tell yourself the colour of clothing the other person will be wearing before you meet. (This does not work for all people or situations. For example, you can reasonably assume a doctor will be wearing white, or you may know someone always wears a particular colour.) This exercise improves your clairvoyant abilities and could help you develop remote viewing skills as well.

Now I have to guess what wavelength the reflected photons of some poorly made sweater are? Why can't I do something awesome like trying to see things by the polarity of light like a mantis shrimp does. How I envy those 16 opsins.

10. Ask three friends a question (such as “what did you eat for breakfast?" or “where do you want to go on your next vacation?") Before you ask your questions, your friends must decide amongst themselves which one will answer falsely, and you must write down which friend will answer falsely. Then you ask your question and listen to each friend reply. Show them the name you wrote down before you asked the question. This exercise helps you develop intuition, precognition and can lead to developing telepathy. This skill is especially valuable in life the ability to recognize deception and even predict it can make your life, and the lives of many others, much smoother.

You have three friends? Congratulations! Now I need one to deceive me? How do I know they are lying? Maybe they made up the lie about whether they lied...Anyway, you are asking them about things that they might have told you in the past or something that they generally have every day...this isn't very psychic of you.